“Your core values act like your internal compass which navigates the course of your life. If you compromise your core values, you go know where.” - Roy T. Bennett

Introduction:

Do you realize the ‘strong’ feelings you have about certain areas of life and business, or a magnetizing pull towards something is often the result of our core values and belief systems.  You can call it an inner ‘compass’ guiding us through decisions, actions, and relationships. 

These fundamental beliefs and principles shape who we are and how we interact with the world. When we stray from these values, we experience inner conflict that can ripple through every aspect of our lives, affecting not only ourselves but also those around us.

These beliefs can change as we grow older, because many were formed by our childhood experiences, good or bad. 

Speaking from personal experience, we can get to a decision stage in life where we realize those beliefs were not yours, but your parents or teachers. The raw fact, I was living a lie and I was miserable. Even though I was successful, I was totally empty and unfulfilled. 

Understanding the impact of this misalignment can help us strive for finding our true self to live a harmonious, successful and fulfilling life.

In this blog you will discover the essential role of core values in achieving success and fulfilment. Learn how they guide decisions, foster self awareness, build resilience, enhance relationships, and contribute to career satisfaction and overall life purpose.

First, let’s look at the effects of being misaligned with your Core Values that I have divided into 4 categories.

I also have created a great FREE interactive resource for this blog, download it HERE >> Identify Your Core Values Checklist for Success

Inner Conflict

Our core values are deeply ingrained, often formed through cultural, familial, and personal experiences. For generations various external pressures and internal dilemmas have led us to act in ways that contradict these values, creating inner conflict. This dissonance manifests in several ways:

Cognitive Dissonance - When our actions contradict our beliefs resulting in feelings of stress, anxiety and making it difficult to maintain inner peace.

Emotional Turmoil - Acting against our values can trigger feelings of guilt, shame, or frustration that can create ongoing emotional instability. 

Identity Crisis - Our values are tied to our identity. When we act against them, we struggle with self-perception and may question our purpose and direction in life. This identity crisis can lead to feelings of confusion and a lack of fulfilment.

Low Self-Esteem - If we are our own biggest critic, our self-worth diminishes and the ripple effect impacts our confidence and self-respect, making it harder to navigate life's challenges.

Persistent Inner Conflict - The ongoing battle between our actions and beliefs can be exhausting. This was me for a long time, the struggle is real! It drains our mental and emotional energy, leaving us feeling conflicted and uneasy.

The Harmful Ripple Effect of Ignoring Your Core Values

It’s more like a tsunami than a ripple. The effect of the above Inner conflict doesn't exist in isolation. It extends its impact to our interactions with others in both our personal life and our professional life.

I know this first hand. 

I was a ‘Lone Wolf’, driven to find both inner peace and success, but my ignorance to not living by my core values (that was hiding in plain sight but I couldn’t see it), kept me from having close relationships and hurt professional relationships.

Eventually I woke up and these were my clear reflections:

Relationship Strain - being so guarded and not living life on my terms affected my Number 1 core value. TRUST! When trust is not there (for yourself and others) strain and tension exist, more so from the energetic perspective. People FEEL this energy.

Communication Issues - Difficulty expressing true thoughts and feelings due to internal struggles often results in miscommunication. Communication breakdown is followed by conflict.

Role Modelling - Those who look up to us, such as children and employees, are influenced by our actions. Inconsistent alignment with values sends mixed messages about the importance of integrity and authenticity, and once again, the ENERGY dynamics of the relationship. 

In my opinion, TRUST is affected again, in fact in all of the areas being discussed here.

Social Disconnect - I always felt like an ‘outsider’ but it was actually by my own doing. Being a Lone Wolf is not the pathway to having a supportive community, your alignment, success or fulfilment. This sense of social disconnect often exacerbates feelings of loneliness and alienation.

Workplace Dynamics - If you are not operating by your core values and aligned with your truth (higher self), you are going backwards. The results often look like conflicts with colleagues and reduced teamwork, impacting overall workplace harmony.

The Broader Impact

This ‘broader’ impact of not living in alignment with our core values I believe leaves a trail of damage intrinsically affecting many facets of our life. Here are just a few, but then has a bigger ripple effect.

Well-being and Mental Health - Prolonged inner conflict and neglect of core values can lead to chronic stress, anxiety, and depression. This decline in mental and emotional well-being affects our overall quality of life, making it challenging to find joy and satisfaction. 

Why I do what I do is because of my real life story. My sister and I were physically and emotionally abused growing up. Our life was survival, so our wellbeing was severely compromised. Personally it took many years for me to undo all the layers, but tragically, my sister committed suicide. I am telling you this so you take action and seek support NOW!

Life Satisfaction - As in the previous point of wellbeing, you often live with your shadow nearby. Living by our core values, determines overall life satisfaction. We feel unfulfilled and disconnected from our true selves, it leads to a pervasive sense of dissatisfaction, emptiness and lack of joy.

Decision Making - Making decisions that align with both personal values and external expectations becomes difficult. Indecisiveness and regretful choices often result from this struggle, complicating our path forward.

Striving for Alignment 

Aligning our actions with our core values is essential for inner peace, emotional stability, and fulfilling relationships. These are all of my experiences.

This enriches the forward motion of being authentic, building self trust and trust of others, integrity, and positively impacting both ourselves and those around us. 

These are 4 steps below I would start with to help strive for alignment with your core values… or just trying to figure them out. 

Self-Reflection - I do this most days. It is a habit that I built over time. If you regularly engage in self-reflection, you will tap into your inner guidance system and really begin to understand your core values and how they guide your actions. Journaling, meditation, and conversations with trusted friends can aid in this process.

Set Boundaries - Once you begin to understand WHO you truly are, you instinctively establish clear boundaries to protect your values and ensure your actions align with them. Don’t be afraid to communicate these boundaries to others and stand firm in upholding them.

Seek Support - Find your ‘tribe’. Like Rumi said “Set your life on fire. Seek those who fan your flames” 

Surround yourself with people who share your values and can provide support and encouragement. It’s ok to let go of the ‘dream-stealers’ that may be a wolf in sheep's clothing.  Building a supportive network helps reinforce your commitment to living in alignment with who YOU truly are. 

Continuous Learning - We never ‘arrive’. Live with an open mind and growth mindset ‘way of being’. It will serve you tremendously and open many doors of opportunity both personally and professionally.

Learning to stay open to new experiences and perspectives that can enrich your understanding of your values and how to live by them.

Conclusion...

You can now see the importance of taking the time to discover your core values. They are only unique to you, and I recommend you take the time to explore your fundamental beliefs and principles, they shape who we are and how we interact with the world. 

The detriment of neglect can result in inner conflict that can ripple through every aspect of our lives, affecting not only ourselves but also those around us.

By consciously aligning our actions with our core values, we pave the way for a more harmonious, fulfilling, prosperous life. This alignment not only enhances our well-being but also strengthens our relationships and professional endeavours, creating a positive ripple effect in all areas of our lives.

Go on a new enlightening quest and grab your free interactive Core Values Cheat Sheet to give you great prompts to discover or reflect upon who the TRUE YOU really is.

Reminder!! Download your FREE Checklist - Identify Your Core Values for Success >> HERE

I got you!

ALWAYS IN YOUR CORNER

BIG LOVE & GRATITUDE

Lisa X

Watch this short video as Lisa discusses what you need to know about your TRUE Core Values and their impact on both success and fulfilment.